Created in His Image
Growing up redhead, I got picked on a bit, but I had it no worse than anyone else. We all have our crosses to bear. I felt a lot better when I heard that Al Roker’s formative years were spent dodging Fat Albert references. I got off easy, except for those goddamn Chuck Wagon commercials.
My favorite cereal was Count Chocula. Of course, my little sister’s was Frankenberry, and she tried her best to get that nickname to stick. Mom didn’t allow cussing, which is where the nickname “Beastard” came from. (In case you were wondering. I called her “Botch.”) Mom hated it, but gave us points for creativity.
I just finished reading Tom Davis’ book, 39 Years of Short-Term Memory Loss. Great stories about SNL, and a nice walk back in time to my teen years. My favorite part? When Al Franken complained that General Mills had stolen his likeness:
“Frankenberry has my eyes, and my jaw. The top of his head? That’s my ass!”
I got off easy…
Thanks to blogadilla.com for the images.
The Mystery Machine
After all those months bragging about specialty haircuts, notice how quiet it’s been? Clairissa, my lovely barber and friend, loaded up the truck and moved away to Californ-i-ee, so I’ve been letting the hair grow. Between the mop of hair on top and lack of beard, people are looking at me and asking, “What’s different?”
I’m like AC/DC; same songs, different album cover.
Things didn’t turn out so well in sunny SoCal, and the girls are back. Good thing; a haircut was in order. Read the rest of this entry »
After-School Special
I crack wise about being old, but 47 isn’t that old.
I live with a fifteen-year-old, and think of how tortured he’d be if he had to amuse himself the way I did. (“Library? Why would I want to go there? I can use your computer!”) Not only did I read more than he does, there were fewer electronic amusements to distract one from an education. He’s got DSs, Wiis, Playstation3000s, etc… I didn’t even have Pong. “Get up off your ass and play real ping-pong!” Dad would say.
And then there’s television. We have about 130 channels to choose from. In my day, there were about five. I remember the afternoon routine well… Read the rest of this entry »
We’ve got a really big shoe tonight…
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Just when I think I’ve seen it all, something new comes along.
Last night provided a typical example. It was early evening at work. Dr T stopped by to return some books, offer a break to visit the “necessary room,” get change, etc… It had been quiet, we stood there passing the time when Weird Steven walked in. Carrying the biggest shoe I’d ever seen. Read the rest of this entry »
Sinko de Weekend
Ah, another gorgeous Sunday morning, which means it’s time for work. Oh joy.
I loved having Sundays off. If I had to see someone in person, it was the one day I could count on doing so. Now I have Thursday, Friday and Saturday off, to which I’m adapting. The world’s a lot more active on Thursday night, and I can participate. The nice thing about working Sunday? By the end of Monday, my week’s half over. That has a pleasant ring to it.
Friday, as I killed time waiting for paychecks, I got a text message from Boss Whitney. “Call Master P.” Hmm.
“Do you mind if I make a quick phone call? Boss wants to talk to me.” I was at Raven’s, sitting in her dark, quiet hotel room.
She assured me no offense would be taken. “However, if you walk in, sit down, whip out your phone and start calling all your friends just to chat, I might get a little catty…”
I wanted to make this short and sweet. “Hey boss, what’s up?”
“Oh hi, just the man I want to talk to. I made a schedule snafu, and I really need someone to work the Waterfront store Saturday night. It’s Cinco de Mayo, and I underbooked.”
“Sure, no problem.” My weekend plans had been canceled one by one, right down to the haircut. (More on that later. Yes, Clairissa is back in town.) Instead of sitting in front of the TV watching sports etc… I could be getting some extra cash.
“You’ll be working with Weird Steven. He’ll close, you’ll work backup until midnight.”
Uno de Mayo
Hola!
I’ll always have a fond place in my heart for May Day. It symbolizes new beginnings (“Hi summer!”) and starts the countdown to my birthday. This year’s birthday (and May Day) will be quiet affairs. I’m in low-impact mode. I tore it up pretty good last year, made every drop count. It doesn’t even sound good now.
Think I’ll make like a giant lizard and go sun myself on a rock.
