“Not In The Face?…”

August 16, 2016 at 11:00 am (Cussed Dumbers, That's not funny...)

I hate it when things don’t work out. You think you see what is a good fit, and maybe it was for a while. But things change, things get old, we grow. As we get older, we discover what’s important to us. I have discovered, for instance, that a job and a home and a sorta-well-taken-care-of family is my goal, and what I have attained. It’s not perfect, but it works pretty well for me.

Therefore, I must do what I have to to protect it.

There’s been a lot of stress at work, involving a close personal friend. They seemed the perfect fit for the job, and I was one of many who harangued Master P and his consiglieres until we gave this person a job. It worked well for a couple years, then issues began arising. Issues that often shouldn’t involve work. Issues that seemingly could be taken care of with a bit of give and take. But when two sides are all take and no give, we have breakage.

We’ve all loved and stood by this person, advising them to back off. It’s turned into a big-cock contest, and unfortunately for this person Master P can afford to buy a bigger cock. It’s not going to end the way this person wants.

So when I got calls from Grinder, asking about times, locations and activities, I cut to the chase and called Art East. “Instead of you watching eighteen hours of video, check out these two times.” They only cared about getting the person on tape, so I found two examples. I don’t know what we were discussing, but it will be forever documented in this person’s personnel file. (I think it involved my fondness for black women, actually. So if there are any hot sisters at the unemployment office…) I joke, a little, but it’s hard. I really wanted this person to succeed, and work for us for a long time. They became like a sister or brother to a lot of us, and we cannot understand why they won’t let this one little item go. It’s truly a matter of being stubborn, and one person in this situation is better bankrolled to be the stubbornest.

And it’s not our friend.

So there’s a gloom around the store. Often when it’s “time for someone to go” we enjoy the process. When Elmo got fired it was like a whacking on The Sopranos, and even Master P wore his goombah leather sports jacket for the occasion. This time there was only grimness as we watched the HD monitor. After about an hour, we had two incidences. An hour before the person called in sick, and another about 10 PM, where they visited me for about 25 minutes. I hope the conversation wasn’t too inflammatory, and I remember mentioning that hanging out at the job you called in sick to may not be the best idea, but after drinking at the strip club all day, they probably needed to focus on something besides video poker machines and G-strings. I think they may have caught a shoplifter, even.

Alas, we will see. Master P hates to fire people, but if he gets cooperation he will likely keep the person on, and all will be mostly forgotten. Master P is insanely forgiving; all he wants is to be able to sign a few checks, look around to make sure all the ice bins are full, and then he’s off to Dubai for horsedivers and marteenies while we babysit the goons and minions.

That’s all we want too. And I want my buddy around to eyefuck the dirt urchins when they swarm the wine rack, and rassle tweakers to the floor over a Jolly Rancher. We have a lot of fun working.

Let’s quit fucking around and get back to work, or you’ll end up like Big Pussy.

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1 Comment

  1. 2soon said,

    How’s the Gravy?

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